Tired of watching body parts fly everywhere? Medics are. “I couldn’t even find one of her legs! “ complained Nashville medic John Scally after arriving at Covenant School. “I looked all over the place!” he wailed, scooping up whatever brain splatter he could find.
An AR-15 is a classic case of overkill (pun intended), when a smaller gun, using smaller bullets, will do the job just as well. And a smaller bullet not only will kill but will leave the body intact, saving medics time and money when searching for remains before loading bodies into ambulances. Or hearses.
The much loved AR-15 is an adult gun, meant to be used by adults to kill adults. The Washington Post provides a graphic explanation about what a .223 bullet, one that can cross six football fields in under a second, does to the body. It’s silly to use such a thing on a child.
More Fun Ways To Kill Children
Introducing…
Killing Children For Fun Since 1776!
Medics will appreciate saving time searching for all that icky stuff. Taxpayers will, too, knowing that paramedics run on the taxpayer's dime. Ambulances will spend less time cleaning up after a school shooting. And multiple kindergartners and pre-schoolers can fit in the back of one ambulance, where adults have to go one at a time. Have you ever had to pay for an ambulance? Not cheap, I tell you.
Even the bullets are fun!
Shaped like Hello Kitty, the ammo is the cat’s meow! Hardly drawing any blood, the entrance and exit wounds are almost identical! Even the guns meow as they’re fired.
And hey, wait! You can get a Designer Gun, named after beloved gun lovers! Behold below
The handle is shaped in the form of Lauren Boebert’s body! For shooters of the Boebert Blaster you can
FONDLE WHILE FIRING!
And better, when you run out of Hello Kitty ammo, her empty body and brain doubles as a PEZ dispenser. (Candy Not Included )
New models are in production. The MTGreene Gotcha!, a special edition model. Silent when the ammo misses, but yells “Gotcha!” when it finds flesh. And of course, knowing our 2nd Amendment-Loving Gun-Worshipping GOPers, when your Boeberts and Greenes run empty, you know you GOTTA GETTA GAETZ!
